Several months ago, probably close to a year by now, we decided it was probably time to get a new vacuum. The poor thing breaks in half nearly every time I use it. This makes it very difficult to use, and probably is a sign the vacuum is done for. However, this house is rather new to us, and so we had a whole list of things we "needed" or "wanted" for the house. So, my husband glued the vacuum back together, and we got a kitchen table, raised our garden up for a raised bed garden with 7 beds, bought our son a bedroom set, and got a piano.
Apparently our vacuum did not support our choice to wait on replacing it, and early this summer it shot a fireball out at me. My husband looked it over, rigged it up, and it was running again. So, I went back to ignoring it's issues and using much tape and glue to hold it together.
Today the vacuum decided it had quite enough, I suppose. At least that's the message I got from the second, much larger and smokier fire ball it shot out at me. My 4 year old shrieked "What's going on!?!", and I said "Well, I think it's dead." So, I made the call downstairs to my husband in his home office
Me :"How many fireballs does this thing need to shoot at me before you get me that Dyson?"
Him: "The vacuum?"
Me: "Yes, it shot fire out at me. Your son was right there, too. It tried to torch us."
Him: "Did it turn off?"
Me: "No, not at all, it totally sustained some sort of fire making incident without shutting down. Maybe it's a dragon. Of course it shut off!"
Him "Well, I didn't know if you shut it off."
Me: "It created fire, threw it at me, and shut down. It was a suicide mission."
Him: "We can't afford the Dyson you want."
Me: "We can't afford NOT to get a Dyson. I did my research. Dyson was recommended by way more of my friends than any other vacuum. And, not once, did anyone mention their Dyson being responsible for any arson or attempted murder by fireballs."
Him: "We'll see. Do you have a coupon?"
Me: "Of course I have a coupon. Do you even know me?"
Part of me wants to keep this vacuum just because it's gotten to the point of ridiculous. I mean, what else would it resort to in an effort to terminate it's cleaning contract? Maybe I don't want to know.