Sunday, October 23, 2011

Today it's 2 for the price of 1

I know, I just posted, but this little gem just came up.  I just have to share my husband's charming and inspirational way with words (in case you all miss the whole dog butt conversation) with the world...

Me I'm so sick of these last stubborn pounds.  I need to tweak my diet again to get things moving.

Him Now, remember, the more weight you lose the older you will look.

Me What are you saying?  You think I look old?

Him No.  I'm saying you'll look older if you lose any more weight.  What was your lowest?  You were too thin then.  Remember that picture of you in the attic in a white shirt, and how young you looked.  You looked good then.

Me Still sounds like you're telling me I look old now.  I was heavier AND younger back then.  So do I look bad and old now?

Him I'm stuck in a hole now, aren't I?

Me Yep.  You wanna keep digging?

This conversation comes off of the other following romantic talk from my husband:

Me There was a nice man chatting me up at Mom's work today.  He thought I was one of the therapists.  

Him He can have ya!  

Me Now, now, settle down!  What would you do without me?  If you didn't have me, who would spend your money?  You'd have sad, lonely money locked away in some dark place collecting dust and looking pitiful, instead of being turned into beautiful things... shiny things... you know, what it dreams of being used for.

Him Exactly... hop in the car... I'll drive you back to him.

And this morning...

Me Hey, come here!  Look how I reorganized my gift wrapping closet!

Him Can't you just describe it to me?

Me No, I can't describe such a vision, you need to see it with your eyeballs.  Now, please come here.  It'll be quick.  It's awesome.

Our son Daddy, I think Mommy wants you to go look at what we did upstairs in the Hello Kitty room.  It's amazing.

Me See!  Even he thinks it's cool.  Come look!

Son Daddy, Mommy says go look!

Him Ask Mommy if she can just take a picture on her phone and send it to me.

Me Really?  You can't come humor me and look at the result of my hard work?

Him Just take a picture and show that to me.

Me Alright, fine.  If that is how this works, the next time you want to see something in person I'll take a picture of it and send it to you instead with a little footnote referencing this conversation.

Son What is Mommy talking about?

Him She's crazy.

Son Yeah, I know.

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