Today was the first day of kindergarten for my oldest son. I was so nervous for him, as it's his first full day program. Of course, he did fine. He was STARVING when he got home... did you know they don't give snacks in kindergarten anymore? At least not here? Poor kids! They also moved school back an hour this year, so they get home super late. Not a great time for a snack when it's an hour away from dinner. School budget cuts. Yippie. Anywho....
I figured out which ring in Hell I will be sent to when I die... the "My grandfather gets his first skype call WHILE he has me on speakerphone" ring. Yes, you read that right. My grandfather, who is hard of hearing, puts people on speakerphone when they call. So everyone is always shouting back and forth to hear each other. I called him to wish him happy birthday, and got the speakerphone. Suddenly, there is this loud, electronic noise in my ear.
GF Oh wait, Honey, my computer says I'm getting a call from your cousin! What is this?!
Me Do you have skype? Is it a skype call?
GF Oh yes! Skype! *to the skype caller* HELLO!? HELLO!?
*Then I hear them singing happy birthday to him*
GF Oh hello! Thank you! Hello? Hello? HELLO!? CAN YOU HEAR ME?! I DON'T THINK THEY CAN HEAR ME! Honey, I don't think they can hear me. What's going on?
Me Um, do you have a microphone?
GF *now yelling at "The Skype"* Um, DO I HAVE A MICROPHONE?! WHERE IS MY MICROPHONE?! WHAT DO I DO?! HOW DO I FIND A MICROPHONE?! CAN YOU HEAR ME?! LOOK DOWN THERE. IS THAT A MICROPHONE?! IS IT PLUGGED IN?! I THINK IT'S UNPLUGGED! WAIT, WHAT IS THAT PLUG?! CAN YOU HEAR ME?!
Me Sometimes when my husband skypes with me we just call on the phone for sound because my mic doesn't work sometimes. You can try that, and I can talk to you later.
GF Oh no, honey, that's okay. *back to skype* HELLO?! HELLO?! I DON'T THINK YOU CAN HEAR ME!
SKYPE CALLER We can't hear you! Is your mic on?
*Oh for the love of all that is pink and sparkly, SHOOT ME.*
This went on for over 15 mins before my Grandmother picked up another phone, whispered they'd call me back and I thanked her and quickly hung up. I didn't know they were inventing new rings in Hell, but I guess, for me, they made an exception.
In closing, I shall end with a silly "First day of kindergarten" tid bit... My son was only too happy to report today that some poor kiddo peed on the floor at school today. He assured me that the boy did not mean to do it on purpose and "The teacher called for the equipment to come clean it up. The equipment just appeared magically. I don't know where they were hiding, but suddenly they were there. The equipment didn't do such a good job though." So, I'm trying to figure out if this "equipment" is a person. I asked him if he meant "janitor" but he just repeated "equipment." I cannot wait to hear what other exciting things he'll learn about in school this year. haha I have a feeling I'll be hearing all the juicy kindergarten goss.