Sunday, August 11, 2013

We Don't All Know Each Other

I am half Jewish, to try to put it simply.  Most people do not really care.  They may know, but they don't feel the need to constantly bring it up, act like I am always thinking about Israel, bring up any little fact or tidbit that has to do with the Jewish faith or culture... you get the picture.  Most people, but not this one particular person in my life, who it must REALLY bother, because they constantly bring it up.  They constantly weave it into stories or events that have, as they should, nothing to do with me being a Jew.  It is always awkward, and also fruitless, as I do not practice Judaism as a religion.  We observe some holidays and cultural traditions, but I'm not a practicing Jew. 

Anywho, today I got an email that was just pure gold.  It is so important to this person to mention that I'm Jewish or remind me of Jews that he forces the topic into places it really has no business.  It seems almost frantic.  I have yet to figure out any other explanation, other than maybe he wants to convey "Hey, I'm totally down with the Jews!"  I'm not sure.  It's far less important to me than it is to him, though.  So, this man sends me an email this morning, in regards to a pig roast my husband and I attended yesterday.  It said:

So how did the (pig) roast go?  Kinda reminds me of ancient Jewish get togethers.

First of all, even if you ignore the non-ancient in-ground pool, beer, and total lack of Jews (aside from myself), it was a PIG roast.  But, technically, yes, people gathered together, just as many ancient peoples, not limited to Jews, did. So aside from it being inappropriately added to this conversation, it was waaaaaaaaaaay off base. He must've missed "Jews 101", as my sister calls it.  "Christians believe in Jesus, and Jews don't eat pork."
I was obligated to respond, as he asked how it went... so I tried to go easy on him, but I am what I am, and couldn't fully help myself.

The pig roast was a lot of fun.  Interesting note: Jews don't eat pork.  It's not kosher. (winky face) One of the several reasons a bacon cheeseburger is out of the question.  But, I'm sure the ancient Jews had lots of porkless parties.

Then I died laughing.  I'm writing this from my special place in Jewish Hell.  I'm sitting right next to all those ancient Jews who had pork roast parties.  Oy vey.

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